Grateful for the not so Great Moments: A Reflection in a Season of Gratitude

Many people spend the month of November practicing an attitude of gratitude. We use the month recognized for family, thankful pilgrims and forgotten Native Americans to look at our own lives and the things we are most thankful for. For some, it’s family, friends or a fulfilling career and for others, a time to be thankful for a roof over their heads, a healthy body and a full belly on a regular basis.

This month, I, as well, have decided an attitude of gratitude is due, but in a very different way. I am grateful for the experiences of my past, even those I wasn't so appreciative of in the moment.

I was inspired in the midst of this week’s Halloween festivities at my school. As I encouraged the next contestant in my ASB’s Halloween catwalk to go down the “red carpet” with as much attitude as was abundant in his bad greaser wig, I flashed back to the fundraiser fashion show I chaired in college and the moment when I told the model to walk with a rebellious strut as Public Enemy’s, “Fight the Power” played. In that same moment, I went further back in time to my own inaugural turn on the catwalk as a 14 year old who had dreams of being the next Beverly Johnson, but was told I was never going to be tall enough and to give up. Not becoming a model made me believe I was a failure, not making gobs of money for charity after the hours of planning that went into the charity fashion show, made me think I was a failure; but as that kiddo strutted his stuff down the center of our school with a smile and as I watched the high-five he received from a friend afterward, I realized all was not for naught. My “failures” were there to teach me how to enrich the lives of others that day and in many days to come.

A few days later, my poor girl-child sends me a texted photo of hair gone bad. I immediately began problem solving, and in the midst of my conference, texted words of comfort, sent a potential solution and contacted a professional for advice. A few hours later, a squeal of delight and bear hug helped me remember my relaxers turned scab fests, bad haircuts and date night hair woes, were devastating at the time, but were actually not truly about me. They were situations that trained me to help others in the future. This time, my own child.

So, for that, I am grateful for the moments that taught me to be creative, think on my feet, and move forward even when I thought my world was over. I am grateful for the heartache of mourning, the loss of friendships, bad hair, fatigue and all the other situations that taught me I “could,” even though I shouldn't have been able to make it through. Because now, I can enrich the lives of others. I can smile the grin I couldn't in the midst of past situations and can help to rescue others.

I do not say that I am Wonder Woman, only that I want to be like my hero and save the world and look fabulous while doing it. And for that, I am grateful, this month and always. For better or worse, I am grateful that I can give.